I'll Stand Up For You

There's a lot of outrage these days when it comes to politicians, cable news, talk radio, and protesters. I have watched efforts to get these guys off the air or shut these people up. Please remember that for one side to be free, the other side must also be free.

Every issue has a multitude of ways it can be viewed. My life experiences have led me to view things from a unique perspective. Your life experiences may have brought you in at a different angle, but both are valuable enough that neither should be extinguished.

We may never find common ground outside of being fellow citizens. But citizens of this great United States of America. Our country is the envy of the oppressed that cannot speak out, cannot write freely, and cannot protest openly. We cannot allow ourselves to become haters of opposing views and haters of dissent. We are better than that.



Here are some of the best quotes I’ve found on the subject:


The only valid censorship of ideas is the right of people not to listen. ~Tommy Smothers


Censorship reflects society's lack of confidence in itself. It is a hallmark of an authoritarian regime. ~Potter Stewart


Think for yourselves and let others enjoy the privilege to do so, too. ~Voltaire


I am thankful for all the complaining I hear about our government because it means we have freedom of speech. ~Nancie J. Carmody


The peculiar evil of silencing the expression of an opinion is, that it is robbing the human race; posterity as well as the existing generation; those who dissent from the opinion, still more than those who hold it. If the opinion is right, they are deprived of the opportunity of exchanging error for truth: if wrong, they lose, what is almost as great a benefit, the clearer perception and livelier impression of truth, produced by its collision with error. ~John Stuart Mill, On Liberty, 1859


To reject the word is to reject the human search. ~Max Lerner, 1953, on book purging


Wherever they burn books they will also, in the end, burn human beings. ~Heinrich Heine, Almansor, 1823


Every burned book enlightens the world. ~Ralph Waldo Emerson


The test of democracy is freedom of criticism. ~David Ben-Gurion


If all mankind minus one were of one opinion, mankind would be no more justified in silencing that one person than he, if he had the power, would be justified in silencing mankind. ~John Stuart Mill, On Liberty, 1859


To limit the press is to insult a nation; to prohibit reading of certain books is to declare the inhabitants to be either fools or slaves. ~Claude-Adrien Helvétius


We are not afraid to entrust the American people with unpleasant facts, foreign ideas, alien philosophies, and competitive values. For a nation that is afraid to let its people judge the truth and falsehood in an open market is a nation that is afraid of its people. ~John F. Kennedy


God forbid that any book should be banned. The practice is as indefensible as infanticide. ~Rebecca West


If we don't believe in freedom of expression for people we despise, we don't believe in it at all. ~Noam Chomsky


I disapprove of what you say, but I will defend to the death your right to say it. ~Voltaire

Meandering

Somewhere between Atlantic City and Park City, UT sits the little town of Cambridge City, IN. Starting out just south of home, my friend Cindy and I head east on Rt. 40, making our way down the National Road to this little city.

It’s my favorite way to spend a beautiful Saturday. This road takes you past small town America in action. Yard sales, tractors, cows, ball fields and clothes lines all stretched out for miles. The sights along the way instill a feeling of joining forces with a different style of living. Spending the day on Route 40 is therapeutic for me in a way I can’t quite explain.

Not a serious antique hunter, I am in love with the little shops along the way of one of the earliest highway projects in the United States.



Walking down Main Street in small town USA, I can remember walking downtown in my own little hometown as a child. I can remember pausing at store windows and feeling a nostalgia I didn’t understand then either. My antique store affection comes more from those childhood memories than any serious search for matching Waterford glasses and decanter set. My love is for the plundering. Spending the night at my grandmother’s house always included plundering a drawer or two in her bedroom, a cabinet with my Aunt Brenda’s old dolls or going through those old books on the shelf. Those nights filled me with appreciation for small treasures and anticipation of finding something that was once meaningful in someone’s daily life. It helped me understand that something doesn’t have to be valuable to be valuable.
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On the trip I touched items from a different time, like the vintage baby bonnet from 1832. And some not quite vintage items like a Starsky and Hutch lunchbox. There were rusty old tools, glassware in every color, and rustic tables. I found several scales (my favorite) with chipped paint, wooden bowls and pre-prohibition barrels.



These shops are testament to the adage that one man’s trash is another man’s treasure.



All this pillaging leaves one ready for lunch and this old trail doesn’t disappoint. The Hilltop just above Cambridge City offers a “walk up to order” window for the best burgers around. Sitting on the bench facing the road, waiting for the hand patted burger to cook, is just another treat the day has to offer. Sipping a vanilla coke-another favorite-and eating without feeling rushed at the old stone picnic tables, makes for some much needed time off your feet. There is something small town café’s and eateries offer that you can’t satisfy at McDonalds, Applebee’s or Olive Garden.


Enjoying the wares of one antique store my friend states; “I would love to have lived back then, wouldn’t you?” “No” I reply, “I like cell phones and microwaves.” And indoor plumbing for that matter, but there is something about the ancient that makes my soul feel at home. There is some connection or joy my heart feels among all these items from another era.



It’s the simplicity of a different period. It’s the opportunity to walk down the street with a friend and feel like you are steeling away a few moments in Mayberry. The calm of the pace, the friendliness of the townsfolk…it's a darling way to unwind your mind.

*some photos were found via google search and not the property of any Figley

The Beauty of it All

My annual visit to the beach reminds me of many life lessons:

The rhythm of the tides reminds me that there is a time of giving plenty and time for retreat.

Wait with patience; the ocean must deliver that beautiful shell to the shore.

You really don’t need a lot of things. You can spend an entire day with just a towel

and sunglasses.

Creating memories will last longer than any gift I can give my children.

There are a lot of lessons being at the beach can teach us, but this year, family watching was especially sweet to me. The beauty of the ocean is obvious but I found so much beauty in the people around me. They were all very different, but all so beautiful. And I believe there were life lessons in seeing them all.

The elderly couple out boogie boarding with each other-no grandkids in sight-beautiful

The five year old boy trying for an hour to get the skim board to do what his older brother's did-beautiful

Hearing the grandparents of a divorced daughter telling their grandson that “no matter what your daddy does, he’s still your daddy”-beautiful

The father from NY trying to get that one perfect picture of his sons and taking 100 pictures in the attempt-beautiful

The long haired guy sitting alone just looking out into the ocean-beautiful

The young girls with perfect bodies-beautiful

The old gals in bikinis-beautiful

The young couple with twin babies sleeping under the umbrella-beautiful

The thirteen year old boy who wouldn’t take his shirt off-beautiful

The bunch, just over 21, singing karaoke-beautiful

The baby who tried shaking, wiping and rubbing, but couldn’t get the sand off his hand; the confused look on his face-beautiful

The little boy who looked back at the ocean in disgust when it swept away his sand castle-beautiful

Such simple moments, yet they were all beautiful beyond just seeing them. We live in a wonderful world, with wonderful people. We are all in different stages, and we all come in different modes and models, but it is all beautiful.

Dell Stole my Money!

Customer Service is the second most important thing a business can have. (Quality, pertinant products/service #1) Dear Every Business in the World….if I am spending my ever fleeting time and spending my hard earned dollar on your product/service; appreciate that effort.

Recently (Friday) Emily notices her laptop adaptor is not working. I log on to Bestbuy.com to see if they carry one to replace it. They offer a universal adaptor for about 78 bucks. Thinking perhaps it would be better for the computer if we use the adaptor from that brand (Dell) I check their website before driving all the way out to Best Buy. Dell has the adaptor for $65.99.
Great!
With the non-working adaptor in hand, I verify the numbers/type are correct (don’t want to mistakenly order the wrong thing…you’d never believe the variety of adaptors that exist!) Got it! I proceed with the order, placing said adaptor in my virtual shopping cart. Hmmmmm, shipping and handling….Express/overnight delivery? Just know I justified in my mind the $23.99 S&H because, well, Emily is my baby girl and if I can give it to her I do.
Send!
Within minutes I receive an email from Dell to “acknowledge” my order number 784144226.
About an hour later-another email to “confirm” my order number 784144226.

But wait. Estimated delivery date of June 25th? Standard shipping would have gotten it there by that date. I just paid an extra $23.99 to get it before the standard 5 day delivery.

I call Dell Customer Service. After going through the automated responses, half of which they could not understand my response; I am connected to a rep. I explain my question. “I just placed an order and selected express/overnight delivery, yet my confirmation email estimates a delivery date of six days.” Yes, let me connect you with someone who can help. (?) Second rep-you know the kind-ah, they’ve transferred me to India. Now I have nothing against any group of people-but God it’s frustrating when you can’t understand someone due to their accent-perhaps they feel the same way about me (I am from KY you know) I repeat my concern. This rep (I think) explains that picking the order, possible assembly, etc are all factored in and the express/overnight part is counted from the moment it leaves the warehouse. I don’t like this (I paid extra!) but how can you arguer with that? Fair enough. I’ll wait.

Saturday morning I am dashing through my to-do list for the day. One more item-check bank statement online-and I am done. Next up-lounge pool side. Wait what’s this? Under pending charges: $96.28 charge from Dell at 12:39pm (okay) and $96.28 charge at 1:38pm (huh?) I call customer service.

I explain the problem three times to three people before they forward me to “a rep that can assist me”. Once to my fourth person, I recite the customer ID number (an eight digit number I can repeat with looking at this point). The line goes dead. Hello? Damn. I call back. Same routine as five minutes before-they hang up-I call back. Fourth person-third try-“Please don’t hang up on me!” I explain my dilemma-I request the second (mistaken) order be deleted and my $96.28 refunded. Sorry-you must wait and when you receive the adaptor we will arrange a return.

What is your name?
Shanks Hall.
Let me speak to your supervisor please.
No one else can resolve this any differently.
I know you have a boss-let me speak with them please.
I’m sorry Madame-it is the weekend. No supervisors here.
Then you are in charge? Then YOU fix this. It is YOUR mistake-not mine.
We don’t try to blame the customer, but adaptor was ordered.
You’re saying this is MY error? MY mistake?
Well, Madame, why would company like Dell, do this?
Then why did I not receive an acknowledgement email, or confirmation email for a second order? You really think I would mistakenly log back on to your website and order the exact same adaptor and pay ANOTHER $23.99 for express shipping-an HOUR LATER?
We would be glad to arrange a return once you have received the merchandise.
(this exchange has been shortened to protect the weak and faint of heart. It was NOT pleasant)

Unbelievable!

Fast forward to Sunday. I am really upset over this. I was so very careful about placing the order, ensuring that I had the right product. How did this happen? Perhaps I should get the order number, purchase ID number and verify what email address the acknowledgement and confirmation emails went to for this “mistaken” order. I call Dell customer service. Blah, blah, blah, here’s my customer ID number-call ends. Yes, they hung up, disconnected the call, let me down. I call back. Blah, blah, blah…can you give me the order number? Got it. Can you tell me when and to what email the order acknowledgement and confirmation was sent? They don’t have access to those records!
Whatever-I hang up.

I am at their mercy. I have resigned myself to the fact that Dell is NOT, regardless of all the information I have provided, going to expedite the refund. Shameful!

Today (Monday) at 1:05pm FedEX rings the doorbell and I answer the door to two boxes. Great. I bring the boxes in, select the one with the tracking number provided in the email for the adaptor I order and call Dell to arrange a return for the “mistaken” adaptor.
I am put on hold so the rep can “review the details of the order”. I am certain he is reading Indian curse words about the crazy woman who claims she only ordered one adaptor.

Returning to my call, the rep will send a shipping label to my email address…let me verify he says…m-a-d-r-f-i-g-@aol.com? No, m-a-“T” as in Tom-r-f-i-g-@aol.com. Yes, he says, m as in mike-a as in alpha-d as in Dome-r as in…no,no,no I interrupt…T as in TOM. Yes, D as in Dome….yes I say. Now, when you receive this shipping label, you will need to take the package to the nearest UPS store and drop off. Once we receive the merchandise, we will refund the amount within 31 days.

Great, I tell him. What’s the use in arguing anymore?

My summary is this: Dell stole $96.28 from my account WITHOUT my authorization and WITHOUT sending me an acknowledgement, confirmation, verification or acceptance.
When I called Customer Service; immediately after noticing this, they blamed ME for the mistake. I am assured that most refunds do not take the full 31 days…but Dell has now had MY money for 3 days too long.

$96.28 isn’t the end of the world-but it’s the entire principle of the thing. Imagine if I had ordered that laptop that Mark needs for work….how much of a banking error would THAT have been?

I will purchase another laptop this year. It will NOT be a Dell. Anyone of you who may be in the market for a computer (or even a computer accessory) please BEWARE.

Customer Service is EVERYTHING.

Maybe

One of the first words kids learn is No. No! becomes the favorite of many a two year old, three year old…sixteen year old. The word No (followed closely by Why) is a tool that children use to fix their mistakes, and hide their fears…and can be fighting words for us Mothers.

The tables turn however when children start asking questions of their own.
I have been thinking a lot about my own use of the word No with my kids. “Mom, can we eat out tonight”? No! “Mom, can I take the car?” No! “Mom, can we have ice cream for dinner?” No! This list could go on and on. No has always been the most comfortable answer to most any question that comes out of the mouth of my children. This has been true whether they’ve been 2 or 21.

No means they are eating a healthy diet, No means they are safe at home. No means they are not spending my money, hanging out with friends that could negatively influence them, or other general disasters that only a Mother can dream up.

The most difficult word for me is Yes. Yes comes with worry. Yes comes with responsibility and unfamiliar territory. Yes means loosening control with unknown consequences. Yes means nervous tics, jagged fingernails and wearing a path in the carpet from miles of floor pacing. Yes equals risks.

Mom, can I have the car tonight? Mom, can I drive to Cincinnati? Mom, can I go camping in Arkansas? Mom, can I go canoeing with these 6 people you’ve never met, but you trust my judgment of character and driving ability to get there safely, we’re spending the night camping with nothing between me and the outdoors other than paper thin tent walls, with no sleeping bag, and oh, by the way my cell phone may not work since we will be in the middle of the woods, where by the way, no one would ever hear me scream for help if I needed them!?

Indeed, I struggle with Yes. I have to laugh at myself because in all reality, if my kids were all at home, reading a stimulating novel in their rooms, I would be at my happiest. You want to meet interesting people? Go read Stargirl. You want excitement? Pick up a copy of Holes. You stay safely tucked inside and leave Huck Finn to drift down the river.

Friends have calmed me, reasoned with me, and bought me drinks, after Yes has won its battle. The thing is, I know that saying Yes is more important than saying No. Saying Yes broadens their experience and creates memories that will last them a lifetime.

From the first time I gently unwrapped their hand from my finger and let them take their first step, I was saying Yes. Running along side them and finally letting go of the bicycle seat, as they pedaled along on their own, risking a skinned knee, I was saying Yes.

These are the small steps that prepare us to say Yes to the bigger things in life.
I doubt Yes will ever come without the “what ifs” that play through this Mother's mind.
I doubt I will ever be completely comfortable having my children roaming this earth without their hand tucked safely in mine. But I will listen with excitement, and relief, as they retell their adventures from the protection of the four walls of our home.

The Bow

Mother’s are the ultimate animal in defending her child’s safety and well being. Moms know in their heart that their child is special, deserving and unique. We love our children unconditionally. Peppered with occasional disappointment or distress; Motherhood enables us to see these beings through the sometimes distorted lens of our hearts. The love a mother holds for her children is infinite, unrestricted, unrestrained and boundless. Mothers are proud of the very existence of their child.
My children awe me in too many ways to count. Looking beyond the natural love I feel, there are so many reasons for me to be proud, have respect, value, approve of and LIKE them as people. As I have devoted my life to teaching them, they have taught me so much. So today, the blog is devoted to my children and just some of the reasons they are loved.

10 Things I Love About My Kids

They don’t discriminate
The kids learned many lessons growing up as Army Brats. Their most valuable gain is their
ability to truly accept all people with an open heart. They get to know people rather than
make assumptions based on stereotypes. I absolutely love looking at their groups of friends
and seeing such diversity. They don’t seem to notice, but it is quite amazing. I admire them
in untold measure for this.

They have energy
How do you get up at 5am for work, and then hit the gym for a work-out on your way
home? How does one stay up until 4am then get up and to work by 9:00? How do you leave
for school at 6:30 am, return home at 9:30pm and still make time for homework, studying
and a boyfriend? Living life to the fullest takes the advantage of youth. Ah! to tap in to a
fraction of that excitement for life.

They speak their mind
This one can be a double edged sword. As a Mom, it hasn’t always been easy to have
opinionated kids. It is important to know when to hold your tongue, but sharing thoughts
and opinions helps us understand each other a little deeper. Who among us doesn’t want to
be heard?

They give me advice
Do these jeans make my butt look big? What do you think about this situation? My kids
provide a fresh, youthful outlook on so many things. I recently asked what they thought
about me going with a super short haircut. Emily informed me that “Cutting your hair short
won’t make you look fat; it will make you look fatter”. Ouch! Don’t ask if you don’t want
honesty, right?

They laugh
One of my favorite days ever was spent with Emily running errands and going to the mall.
She spent the day “in character” of someone I’d never met. She didn’t utter a single word in
her own voice that day and I’d never laughed so much. The silliness of their skits in the
living room, their quick wit and ability to appreciate the absurd makes for a life of laughter.
Never a group to take ourselves too seriously, laughter and joy abound!

They vote
Well, only two officially, but with an election year just behind us and a new President in
office, my kids have stayed informed and involved. It is exciting for me to see them excited
about our democracy and watch them navigate their way through the process. People in
history have been imprisoned and even died for them to exercise their right. I’m thankful
they don’t take it for granted.

They are compassionate
I always thought if I could just instill compassion in my kids, they would be well equipped for
functioning in the world. Our entire existence is based on relationships. From our family, to
friends, co-workers, and all of humanity as a whole; we must function as just one player on a
team of billions. My children’s ability to feel another person’s pain, embarrassment, sorrow,
frustration, or concern is awe inspiring.

They believe they can
Self doubt can derail the deepest dream. Doubt will hold you back from trying out for that
solo, keep you from getting that job, or stop you from beginning a new adventure. I’ve
watched with pride as Lyn has changed a headlight on her car, replace a broken doorknob,
and even audition for a TV show. I’ve seen Nate overcome overwhelming odds and come out
a winner, and Emily put herself out there for the world to see. I love that my kids, risking
failure, still try.

They trust their gut
When something doesn’t feel right, it is our built in defense system, steering us in a better
direction. A person who just doesn’t sit right with you, a nagging feeling that there is a better
answer to a dilemma, a drive to take a turn that is different from what the rest of the crowd
is taking…I respect my kids for listening to these things and taking heed.

They are stubborn
This is probably the most frustrating thing about my children, yet I stand in awe of their
ability to stand firm on their beliefs. They are not so inflexible it makes them unable to
consider other points of view, quite the opposite. However, when they believe they are right,
they will defend their position with fervor unmatched by any resolve I may feel.


Further reading…in the book The Prophet, the following premise has offered valuable
guidance in living with teens.

On Children

Kahlil Gibran

Your children are not your children.

They are the sons and daughters of Life's longing for itself.

They come through you but not from you,

And though they are with you yet they belong not to you.

You may give them your love but not your thoughts,

For they have their own thoughts.

You may house their bodies but not their souls,

For their souls dwell in the house of tomorrow,

which you cannot visit, not even in your dreams.

You may strive to be like them, but seek not to make them like you.

For life goes not backward nor tarries with yesterday.

You are the bows from which your children

as living arrows are sent forth.

The archer sees the mark upon the path of the infinite,

and He bends you with His might that His arrows may go swift and far.

Let our bending in the archer's hand be for gladness;

For even as He loves the arrow that flies,

so He loves also the bow that is stable

Flowers are the earth's Amen!

With a few warm days behind us, my mind drifts into a field of flowers as I anticipate spring. Today while driving down the road, I spotted a small blanket of wild violets creeping along the floor of a wooded area. My heart jumped with joy! I love flowers; it's probably the most "girlie" thing about me.

The detail of a flower simply fascinates me. It is so intricate, both huge and small at the same time. Please take the time to visit this website and behold the amazement of a simple flower:

http://ninipixel.aminus3.com/image/2008-06-03.html

One of my favorite things to paint are flowers, but an artist can not do justice to what God has placed on this earth.

One of my favorite sayings goes like this:

"If I love each budding tree, each flower petal, bud and stem, then how much more I should revere the God which has created them."

My hope is that your heart too is stirred by the miracle of a simple plant.

A House is Not a Home Without a Dog

This is one of my all time favorite email go 'rounds. As a dog lover, I know there is much to learn from our pets. They calm me, listen to me, and are always concerned for my well being. I truly hope to learn to love as unconditionally as my Lucy and Lola love me.

Things I've Learned From My Dog

When a loved ones come home, always run to greet them.

Never pass up the opportunity to go for a car ride.

Allow the experience of fresh air and the wind in your face to be pure ecstasy.

When it’s in your best interest; practice obedience.

Let others know when they’ve invaded your territory.

Take naps and stretch before rising.

Run, romp and play daily

Thrive on attention and let people touch you.

Sometimes you have to make noise to get someone’s attention

Avoid biting, when a simple growl will do.

On warm days, stop to lie on your back on the cool grass.

On hot days, drink lots of water and lay under a tree.

Be patient-the first lick doesn’t always do the job.

When you’re happy, dance around and wag your entire body.

No matter how often or severely you’re scolded…run right back and make friends.

Delight in the simple joys of a long walk.

Eat with gusto and enthusiasm.

Be loyal.

If what you want lies buried, dig until you find it!

When someone is having a bad day, be silent and sit close by.

Get outside and run around everyday

The Last

We always celebrate firsts...take a look at your child's baby book and you have undoubtedly recorded the first smile, first haircut, first tooth, first step and first word.



The most difficult "first" I think I endured was watching my baby (Lyndsay) drive out of my sight alone and driving all by herself for the first time. I held my cell phone in my hand the whole time she was gone, just in case.



What I truly wish I had held closer to my heart though are the "lasts".

I don't recall the last time I held one of my kids in my arms and rocked them to sleep. I have no recollection of the last time I held one of their hands to cross the street, or the last time they sat in the grocery cart seat. If I had known it was the last fort built with blankets on the dining room table, would I have crawled in there with them?

When you lose someone you love, your mind naturally returns to those "lasts". The last time we talked, our last visit, the last time we ate together.

The day before my Mom died, her sister brought a strawberry cake to us. My Mom and I sat up in the bed and laughed while we ate cake. I somehow knew it would be a "last" and enjoyed it with the heart of a five year old.

We don't always get that lucky though. We don't always have warning signs indicating trouble ahead, or even a heads up that change is on the horizon. And while I don't want to live in a morbid state of "what if this is the last kiss, last, hug, last talk, last phone call, last email, last time...", I do hope those lasts will live on in my heart.

What I am certain of is that when my grandchildren want to build a "cushion city" in the living room, I'm in. They may never ask me again!

Wretched

(Make sure your speakers are on so you can hear the music that goes along with the show!)

Lawrence Central Winter Guard debuted their "wretched" look this weekend at the Pike High School competition. My big idea was to video the show to post here on the blog, but due to mechanical glitch (meaning I was the one video-ing) I ended up with a nice video of the inside of my purse! Thank goodness there was an audience full of other proud Moms, so I do have a few photos to post here...thanks Janet!



This is one of the BEST Winter Guard shows I have ever seen. Keep in mind that between Lyndsay and Emily I have been to 5,428 or so shows over the past five years. Between the music, the look, and the excellent talent of this group, everything comes together in this production to create a show that will make the hairs on the back of your neck stand up.



Lyndsay has been out of guard for three years (she was Emily's inspiration). She made time to go to the competition with Mark and I this weekend, which always adds a new element for me. I love hearing her opinions of shows and gaining some of her perspective. I think she was proud of her little sis.
<---This one is Emmy...you may not recognize her with all the make-up and hair! It is always an exciting part of the Winter Guard season to find out what the make-up and hair will look like and of course the uniforms or outfits. This was the first competition in full "gear" and they indeed look like a wretch seeking Grace. (show theme)



They ended up with a penalty this week from what I heard. Groups have a set time to get on and off the floor and apparently we took a little too long, but LC still walked away with the top score for their group. 75.9 is a great score for this time of year...even if it really could have been a 77.4.

LC Winter Guard consumes my every Saturday through March and I can't think of ANYTHING I would rather do. Although I love Marching Band season...Winter Guard is focused on the guard in a small setting. We are in Terre Haute next week, then Ft. Wayne, ending up with our last few competitions in the Indy metro area. If anyone out there hasn't seen a winter guard show I invite you to come check it out...you may end up as hooked as me!

Winter Update

It's Winter Guard Season and LC is off to a great start. We haven't performed in full uniform, hair and makeup yet, so I really look forward to this weekend at Pike High School! The best I could do for those interested is post the music the girls perform to. So as you read through the blog enjoy Ani Defranco's version of Amazing Grace...it is truly...well...amazing.

All the snow has been both a beautiful sight and a mess! I simply love watching Lola romp around, now that it isn't over her head. She runs and gets her ball, then asks to go outside where she can play by tossing it then digging for it. There are few things more beautiful to me than a pup with a face full of snow. Lucy on the other hand is scared to death of slipping and falling so she insists on help. Thank goodness Emily doesn't mind lending her a hand while she is "doing her business". Of course, other down sides are the number of times we've shoveled the walk and driveway-thanks Nathan-and the constant melted snow in the house from our shoes.
At least I'm not in Kentucky with all that ice!!!

Many of you may not know, but Mark started a new job in December. He is working in the local MEPS center, and works with individuals entering the Army. Ever since we moved here, every time we would drive past the Army Finance Center, he would say something along the lines of, "One day I want to work in that building". I say, If you can dream it you can do it!

Lyn is still working away and saving money. She suffered a little setback when her anticipated roommate couldn't go in on the apartment, but at least she figured it out before they moved in!
As of now, all of her earthly possession are boxed up and waiting for the ideal roommate to show up. Until then, I'll keep buying vegetarian frozen foods and listen to her complain about having a little sister who wears her clothes from time to time.

Nate has about driven me nuts with his guitar, but I am proud of how much he has improved. It simply amazes me that he can pick up an instrument and having no background, figure out how to play songs...songs you recognize. He is starting lessons so we will see what more he can do.

Emily, as always, is busy, busy, busy with school and guard. Tonight, she and Hayley are making "western" food dishes for school. Peach cobbler and cornbread...yum!

Okay, next update will hopefully include pictures and perhaps some interesting stories. I do hope you like the show music and as always, you are welcome to post a reply with your own family update!

Up, Up, and Away

Emily took her first plane trip last week and headed out to Arizona with 140 of her closest friends (okay, only about 20 of them are true friends). The Spirit of Central participated in the Fiesta Bowl Band competition and parade, then headed to the Grand Canyon.


As with most people, she was quite nervous about flying and I heard there may have been a tear shed on the way out of Indianapolis. Rest assured she feels like a seasoned traveller after two layovers at the ATL.

Have you ever seen anyone begin their hiking trip in a peacoat and a Coach purse??? Yet hike
she did. Now, I can't even think of the Grand Canyon without that sick, woozy, I'm afraid of big holes in the ground feeling taking me over, and my baby goes out on snow covered trails into the depths of this amazing hole!



Of course having your best guy there with you makes it all the more fun!




And a great group of friends:



Emily enjoyed her trip to New York MUCH more that Phoenix, but at least now she has a little more travel experience under her belt and has a whole weeks worth of great memories that will last the rest of her life.

New Beginnings

Happy New Year! 2009, a brand new year, and a new start. This is one of my favorite times. The newness, blank page, and possibilities a new year offers just thrills me.

Most people make resolutions of some sort. I like to think of it as a time to make goals...goals or steps we can take to inch our lives closer to how we need to live.

Here is a method to lay out your goals, start on that path, and navigate your life to where you want it to go. How exciting! I go through this ritual every year. Although I still haven't achieved my personal best, are any of us ever a finished product?

To start, I divide my goals into several categories: this allows for balance! Then I dwell on what I need to accomplish within each section. Remember, this is for you and the betterment of YOUR life, there is no right or wrong and your goals simply serve as a navigation tool to get you closer to that picture in your mind of how you would like your life to look.

The most important thing about goals is they should be SMART: Specific, measurable, attainable, realistic and timely! For each goal, you should write down HOW you are going to implement this into your life...what day, how long, etc.

I think the biggest hurdle is the realistic part...some years I find that there is so much that needs changed, I need a bulldozer to flatten my life and rebuild EVERYTHING. This is not realistic or attainable! So I start by asking myself; what is the one thing I really need to do within this area, and go from there.

Family/Home Goals:

This is where I list the things that need done inside the house for the new year, like "tile the

kitchen". It is also a place for concept goals for the family: Vacation in Disney or have game

night once per month, or eat dinner together at least weekly (our nightly dinner table

gatherings are just no longer possible).

Spiritual Goals

Join a prayer group, read a bible passage before work each day, attend church more

regularly, something that brings you closer to God and mankind.

Physical Goals

Under this title you can join a gym, exercise at lease three times per week, take a daily walk,

drink less, eat less, etc. I did great at this two years ago, I joined the gym, but haven't

been there once! Maybe go to the gym X times per week would have been a SMARTer

goal for me!

Knowledge Goals

Your mental state needs to be as satisfied as your physical and spiritual state! Read a book

a month, work the crossword puzzle each day, take a class, hone a talent or skill in some

way. Knowledge is power!

Social Goals

This is one of my favorites! My favorite goal I ever committed to fell under this category and

it proved to be good for me and the people I loved. One of my social goals in the past was to

send a piece of mail (with real stamps and everything) to a friend or family member at

least monthly. Sometimes I found a funny card, or ceremoniously, I would sit by the fire

and write a long thoughtful letter to someone who rarely heard how my heart felt about

them. Other months I would send a favorite book or pictures to share. Your social goals may

be completely different, as mine will as well, but a monthly lunch with a friend or hosting an

annual pool party qualify as ways to enhance our social needs.

Financial and Career Goals

Save X amount of $ monthly, pay off your car loan, ask for a raise, change jobs, start your

own business...often success in this area determines how well we excel in other areas

of our life. I do try to avoid tying my other goals to finances, but none of us can live without

money. Let's get ours in order!

Words of Wisdom:

• Do you realize that 95% of our actions are carried out automatically; without thought? Imagine the change we could command in our lives if we commit to making conscious decisions. This morning I woke up, fixed coffee, sat down at the computer and smoked a cigarette. Same thing I do EVERY morning, and I never even had a thought in my mind. I have the power to start my day by showering first, choosing NOT to smoke and stop wasting my time with a computer card game for the first thirty minutes of my day...if only I'd make the conscious choice to do so.

• Try living outside of your limits. Most of us live a safe, familiar life. It's what we know and we are comfortable there. Living inside your limits (daily routine) will give you the same results you have always gotten. Step outside the circle you have built at least occasionally. Eat at that restaurant you drive past, have wondered about, but never tried. Someone in Ashland, KY please stop at the Aladdin Frame Shop on Lexington and 12th Street, go see a movie (Last movie I saw at a theatre was Polar Express and that is just sad) try something new!

• Set goals that you truly desire to achieve. If you have failed to reach a goal, it is because you didn't truly have a burning desire to achieve it in the first place. Weak desire creates weak results!

• Try. This is my favorite word in the English language. (Well, after onomatopoeia and Constantinople) Everything you want to achieve in life can be had through this word. The more you try, the more likely you are to succeed. That success depends on your number of attempts.

• Believe! If you can dream it you can do it! There is no room for doubt in the faithful.

So there you go, my annual thought process as we enter a new year. May we all look forward to the best year of our lives so far!